[Original Post on March 27, 2014]
First of all, we all came from somewhere else, many different places, so to say “I am not of your kind.” actually means you are very much like the rest of us! We all feel like a stranger in a strange land sometimes. I have never fit in. You simply sound exhausted, and possibly depressed. You ARE one of us or you would not have found your way here.
When we are exhausted, everything looks bleaker than it normally does, especially if you take the mundane world at face value. It is easier to become overwhelmed or apathetic. Remember the metaphor “The darkest hour is just before the dawn”? Quite true. I struggled with depression for decades. Seldom any more, although I do get caught up in the fear/survival thing. So hang in there! The Universe knows Right Timing for events, and we are being flooded with love and light energies to assist us in coping and healing. Better days are ahead. Believe.
I go through this no-sleep thing several times a week, too. I can tell you one thing I do when I can is go outside to get moving in nature when energy level and weather permits, because I do sit too much at the computer when on call for work. I also will stop during my trek to just -be- in nature some place quiet, maybe by water. It is quite healing. If you go for a walk/hike/bike ride -anything physical that will connect you to nature, you will de-stress and sleep better. You know why they say “sleep on it”? Because in the light of day, we gain fresh perspective. Although I do like the wee hours when the city is quiet. Herbal capsules that contain Valerian can help with muscle tension, Chamomile, Wild Oats, St. John’s Wort are calming and Melissa (Lemon Balm) quiets “mind chatter” if thinking keeps you awake. I also sometimes listen to guided meditation podcasts for healing (including healing things like psychic attack) as I end up falling asleep, but we get the benefits of the meditation on a subconscious level.
Yes, I also feel RAGE and ANGER at the Cabal, among others, and want to throttle certain individuals at times…but that would serve no one. The paradigm that is dying wants to perpetuate war in the name of peace, and they love to stir these feelings up in people. Doing something physical and harmless is the best way to transmute those energies. Women know this, this is sometimes what fuels a cleaning spree! Women and men run or play sports for the same reason..it’s a healthy outlet. Or punch a pillow. Shut yourself in a room and rip up an old telephone book (if you can find one), all the while yelling at everyone and everything that is angering you. I’ve done this, both alone and in a meditation class where we all ended up in such a rage we were in tears! THE PURPOSE IS TO MOVE THAT ENERGY OUT! I’ve also taken 6 flats of eggs out in nature and thrown them at a tree, each one a person or situation that enraged me. You need to get that out in a healthy manner. (thank the tree, the wild animals can enjoy the eggs). I guarantee you will feel shifted.
Also, don’t underestimate the healing power of play. Even if it is playing with a pet (they love unconditionally and are easier to deal with than most people!). Or go on a Carousel ride, or take a commuter ferry to get some fresh air. Go out dancing. There are plenty of ways to have fun, alone or with others. Having fun will relax us, help us to see the big picture, and gain perspective.
Embrace the new paradigm. You have free will, and now you think you won’t want to stick around, but things are always in flux, so you may feel differently when the time comes. When I feel ready to give up, I remind myself what an honor it is to be alive, to be here to participate and help usher in vast planetary change. Like the firefighters who died yesterday in my city, the good souls of the RM work tirelessly behind the scenes, risking all for the good of humanity. Having endured pain, hardship, loneliness, I certainly want to be here to celebrate! I earned it! Do not worry if all you can do is wish the RV well. I haven’t even made it to the weekly meditations because I am usually working on Sundays and/or I forget. Your presence is what matters. Never try to give more than you can. You are enough as you are. You matter. All of us matter. We are all part of the web of life.
The best way to get outside of yourself and your woes is to count your blessings. Literally, make a list. All the dark things we mention in these threads, in these kinds of websites, it is not about dwelling in the dark, it is about exposing the dark to the Light so that it can be transmuted. The dark deeds are hard to fathom, but people need to know what’s at stake. Light is Information; Information is Knowledge; Knowledge is Power. By popular demand, Power is shifting back to We the People of the United Planet of Gaia. And so, It IS. People have the Power, and have had it all along. Like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, we just didn’t know it. But the time is NOW.
In Lakech (I am another Yourself)
Phoenix, Red Lunar Serpent
Forever Unlimited
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