24th July 2014
By
Lissa Rankin, MD
Guest Writer for
Wake Up World
We’ve
been taught that in order to get what we desire, we need to either
force our desires into being through hard work, sweat, and tears. Or we
need to apply the Law Of Attraction, whereby we visualize what we
desire, say affirmations that affirm that we already have what we
desire, and “manifest” the desire into being. But what if there’s
another way to deal with desire?
In her book
Outrageous Openness, a book which seriously changed my life,
Tosha Silver teaches
that the Law Of Attraction, improperly taught, is merely another way to
push/strive/struggle in order to bring our desires into being. What if
instead of making it happen, we acknowledge our desires, but then turn
them over instantly to Divine Will?
Surrender
in this way is also not about becoming a desireless zombie or getting
rid of your desires. But it’s also not about handing a shopping list to
God, filled with specifics about exactly what you want and when you want
it with the expectation that God will fulfill all your desires. As
Tosha says, “God is not your Costco. God is not your bitch. God is not
here to grant all of your specific wishes like some cosmic fairy
godmother”. The Law Of Attraction implies that you know what’s best for
you. God doesn’t.
But what if it’s not about getting what your ego wants but instead, allowing Divine Will to lead your life?
Tosha’s prayer is one of utter surrender. “Take me over! Use me! Make me yours!”
Can You Trust? Can you imagine letting go of attachment to all your desires, really trusting that living in Divine alignment will be more fulfilling and meaningful than anything your ego might conjure up? Can you dream of trusting that you will be shown your part in the cosmic orchestra in the perfect way, in the perfect time? If that feels impossible, if you can’t bear to trust that the Divine has a plan for you that might be better than your own, Tosha suggests saying a “Change Me” prayer. “Change me into someone who is ready to surrender.”
Here are some examples of variations on Tosha’s “Change Me” prayers, collected from Outrageous Openness.
When things aren’t going well at work:
I
call Divine Order into my work. In the right time, in the right way,
let my offering become available for the good of all, to all who need to
be guided to me and to know.
When you’re looking for love:
The
perfect partner is already selected. He/she is arriving in the right
way at the right time. I am so grateful to receive him/her.
When something you want isn’t happening as fast as you wish:
My life is unfolding in Divine timing. All delays are beneficial. I’m always at the right place at the right time.
When you’re looking for clients:
I’m
now available to receive anyone who can benefit from my teaching. Let
all who need me find me. Let me help relieve suffering. The Divine is my
complete Source for all prosperity and will provide.
When stressed about travel:
Let
every aspect of this journey unfold in harmony. Let Divine Order
arrange and show me every detail. The right airline connection, lodging,
and all else are already selected and I’ll be guided to them easily.
I’ll follow the leads as they are shown.
When you feel an impulse to be of service:
Wherever I can be a force for Love, please guide me. Take me wherever you wish me to go. Let me do your bidding.
When struggling to get over the painful loss of a relationship:
This
entire relationship now belongs to Divine Order. It is in God’s hands
and I am open to a miracle of completion The situation now unfolds in
the perfect way for the good of all. I needn’t fear letting go; my needs
are always met.
When trying to decide about whether to do something you can’t quite afford but wish to do:
Please
show me if you wish me to go. If you do, please bring a sign, and a
miracle. Please show your Divine Will in this matter and send a clear
sign that gives the proper direction. And if for some reason I’m about
to head the wrong way, please, please stop me.
When dealing with writer’s block:
I
ask that if I can be of service, and I this be God’s will, that the
perfect chances will arrive to pulverize this damn writer’s block once
and for all.
When dealing with a customer service cluster f*ck:
With
every fiber of my being I invoke God as my Source and cast the burden
of this mess. I pray that the perfect people who intercede on my behalf
will come at the right moment.
When struggling to find the perfect apartment or just the right parking spot:
I am now being guided to the right apartment [or parking spot] at the right time. It’s already handled.
When unclear about what’s next:
My perfect new path is already selected and will arrive at the right time. I’ll be shown the steps to receive it.
Then,
after making these prayers of intercession, you have to let go and
trust that it’s all handled, even if what shows up doesn’t look the way
you hoped it will look.
Surrender to Trust
Tosha
teaches that surrender is hot. It’s about committing yourself – not
just part of yourself but all of your self – to being available for use
as a Divine vessel. The ego doesn’t like this one bit and will get very
tricky, trying to manipulate you into thinking you need to be in control
if you want to bring your desires into being. The ego cannot trust that
Divine will is better than the ego’s will and so it will convince you
that there is much to DO in order to bring your desire into being.
Surrender
needn’t be misunderstood as passivity. Sometimes inspired actions are
necessary, and Divine will appears as an instinct towards enlightened
action. You can tell the difference between enlightened action and
ego-driven striving based on how you feel in your body. Is it “spanda”,
the rising shakti that leaps you to your feet and makes you say, with a
full body YES, “I’m doing this!” Or are you exhausted just thinking
about what it will take to force what you desire into being? Say yes to
spanda, because it’s a Divine yes. Say no to dread because it’s an ego
trap.
Here’s the “how to” version of what Tosha teaches, boiled down from what I learned in her book and her workshop:
1. Notice your desire or the problem you feel you need to solve.
2.
The minute the desire or problem arises, offer it over to Divine
Will. Say a prayer or set the intention, “If I am to have this or solve
this, please send a sign. If not, please stop me.” The act of the
offering is what creates the conduit for the Divine to allow the
inspired actions that arise spontaneously from within your own body,
thereby opening space for receiving, none of which can happen when
you’re grasping. She uses the example of reaching for a feather. The
very act of grasping for the feather generates a wind current that
pushes the feather away, but if you just stand there and let it float,
if it’s meant to come to you, it can.
3.
Release attachment to outcomes. Once you’ve offered over the desire or
problem, let it go. In this moment, your desires become merely
preferences.
4. Look
for signs. The signs may arise as inner knowing or as external
feedback. Are you getting the “in the flow” green light or is Universal
Intelligence trying to stop you with the cosmic red light? Do youjust
know what you’re supposed to do? Appreciate both “yes” and “no” guidance
with equal openness and gratitude.
5.
Pay attention to “spanda.” Surrendering to Divine Will doesn’t equal
passivity. Sometimes you’ll be called to inspired action. Can’t tell
whether or not to act? Then use your body as a compass. If you’re
considering taking action, do you feel a full body YES that makes you
leap up with enthusiasm? Or does your body feel exhausted at the mere
thought of it? If an impulse to take action feels good to your body, do
it. If not, keep waiting patiently, trusting that the impulse for
inspired action will come when and if it’s time.
6.
Follow the guidance. Guidance may appear as an exciting idea, an inner
voice giving you instructions, a vision, or an external sign from the
Universe. It’s okay to hesitate if you’re guided to do something you’re
not ready to do. But if you get the same message ten times, try saying a
“Change Me” prayer. “Change me into someone who is ready to take action.”
Otherwise, you may remain at the mercy of the fearful small self
indefinitely. If you perpetually avoid what you’ve been guided to do,
you will not succeed in your Divine mission.
Are You In?
Will
you commit to letting the Divine take the lead in your life? For
inspiration, stories of how others have done this, and further guidance,
read Tosha’s book Outrageous Openness (
available on Amazon).
In my endorsement of Tosha’s book, I wrote, “The holy grail is right
here in this gem of a book. Tosha Silver’s wisdom goes down as easy as a
mint milkshake and leaves you feeling so free you’ll want to do
cartwheels on the beach. But don’t be fooled by the simplicity of this
message. Look no further for an easeful path to enlightenment infused
with rapture and hope, which comes as much needed medicine for the
soul.”
I can’t recommend this book highly enough. Really, it changed my life.
Love,
