Jennifer Hoffman | Enlightening Life
On June 4, 2014
http://enlighteninglife.com/qa-anger/
Dear Jennifer: A few years ago I was involved in a family disagreement that forced me to initiate legal proceedings against my siblings. Although I won and they had to repay money they had taken from the family, it would never have happened if they had not been dishonest, thinking we would not find out. There was a lot of money at stake and the situation involved my parents and some other family members. Now that the matter is settled, restitution has been made, and we can get on with our lives, I am still angry at their deception, that they tried to steal from me and from other family members, and that I had to take legal action to stop them. How do I release my anger so I don’t continue to feel this way, as it’s interfering with my life?
Jennifer’s Answer: Any time we are involved in family drama it’s an uncomfortable situation and dealing with deception and dishonesty, from people you think should behave much differently, is hard to get over. And that is your issue. Your anger is a judgment, based on the belief that they should not have acted this way and should have known or done better. Perhaps that is true but your expectations are not aligned with the truth of who they are and to release your anger, you will have to accept them as they are choosing to be, without judgment. I’m not saying that their behavior was OK, just that it’s their behavior and it has nothing to do with you.
Our expectations about others are often based on who they are in our lives and so often those expectations are not aligned with their energy. Think of what you believe parents or family should do because they are your family, or what a husband or wife should do because they are your partner. And then when their behavior is not within the boundaries of those expectations we are disappointed, hurt, or outraged, and wonder how they can do those things to us. But they are not doing them to us — it isn’t personal. They are doing this because that is who they are and they choose to behave in that manner. And all we can do is to accept their choices and decide whether we want these kinds of connections in our life.
The idea that behavior is dictated by connection is false and leads to a lot of disappointment. People act within the context of their own energy and choices, in spite of how they are connected to us. Friends can be loving or betray us; parents can be nurturing and supportive or abusive; partners can be honest and caring or deceitful and cruel; children can be a joy or a challenge. And here is the bigger issue for you, people choose their behavior and actions in spite of what we do for them, and that is the source of your lasting anger.
No matter how nice, kind, helpful, supportive, thoughtful, and considerate you are with others, including your family, they are going to be who they are. Your anger is a judgment of them and of their behavior, of what you think they should be doing or who they should be being, in light of their relationship with and connection to you. The question is not ‘What should I do with my anger’ but ‘How long am I willing to stay in anger and live with the consequences of my anger?’ When you consider the consequences, to you and to your life, of being in the energy of anger and how it impacts you (because it doesn’t have any impact on them), you will choose to let it go when you are ready, to replace it with unconditional acceptance of them as they are, and then you can decide to be with people who love, honor, and respect you and connect with you in ways that uplift you. But don’t be angry thinking they could have been different, because while that is a choice, it is not the choice that they chose to make. And they would probably do the same thing again, given the opportunity. So accept them as they are, then find other people to fill your need for love and support because they are not capable of doing that.
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If you like this article and would like to work with me because you are ready for profound personal and spiritual transformation, consider a personal intuitive consultation or intuitive coaching, where we work together to examine your life path, purpose, potential, and possibilities and help you choose one that will bring you the joy, abundance, love, peace and power that you are ready for. Click here to explore the possibilities for transformation.
Copyright (c) 2014 by Jennifer Hoffman. All rights reserved. You may quote, copy, translate and link to this article, in its entirety, on free, non-donation based websites only, as long as you include the author name and a working link back to this website. All other uses are strictly prohibited.
- See more at: http://enlighteninglife.com/qa-anger/#sthash.M9oC5GlF.dpuf
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Boredom is a Sign You’re Ready for a New Vibe
Jennifer Hoffman | Enlightening Life
On June 9, 2014
- See more at: http://enlighteninglife.com/blog/#sthash.yHsXpmde.dpuf
Have you been bored lately, feeling out of sorts, unmotivated, and maybe even a little stuck? Do you have a lot of things to do but don’t feel like doing any of them? I used to think that being bored meant having nothing to do, so if I had things to do and I was bored, it meant that I was being irresponsible or lazy. But that is not what boredom means. It is a sign that there is an energetic misalignment between the life we are on and new paths, opportunities, and potentials that our soul trying to open our awareness to. Boredom is a tug of war between the mind and the spirit, an invitation to find another way to ‘be’, instead of finding something else to do. (Why you’re seeing a photo of my bathroom is explained at the end of the article).
Our needs change over time and we feel stuck and frustrated because the energy that is creating the path that we are on is not giving us the results we want. The energy we have used to create our current reality will only fuel that reality. If we want to create something else, we need to use different energy. We have been taught that boredom is a sign of laziness or lack of motivation but I think that boredom is one way our soul shows us that it’s time to stretch our awareness and let new things become possible for our life. To do that, we have to bring in the energy that will empower a new reality, to break our own rules about who we are, who we can be, what we are capable of, and what we can be aligned with.
When we’re bored we have to resist the temptation to do something and let our boredom clue us into what is no longer satisfying or fulfilling us. When we’re bored we think that something is wrong with us because we think that busy, productive people are never bored with what they are doing. But we all get bored with our life circumstances at some point and then try to convince ourselves that we should be happy with whatever is in front of us, and make the best of it, no matter how we really feel about it. The relationship that doesn’t work is, after all, better than no relationship at all. The job that we dread going to every day is better than being unemployed. The life routine we have is fulfilling some purpose, even if we get up every day wondering whether this is all there is to life and living. We have been taught to be grateful for what we have but that does not include not wanting something else.
It isn’t a sign of ingratitude, selfishness, incompetence, or even a lack of appreciation to look at our life and decide that we aren’t happy with it, it doesn’t satisfy or fulfill us, or it’s boring. Our next step is what’s important. Do we decide we could have done better, that everything we have done until this moment is wrong, we don’t have what it takes to make changes, or we have been misguided or misled in chasing a path of fulfillment that wasn’t fulfilling? Or do we recognize boredom as a sign that we have ‘run out of energy road’ on that path and it’s time to change the direction, meaning, and purpose of our life? Remember that energy powers the path we’re currently on, and to empower a new path in a fulfilling way, we have to use new energy. Otherwise, we’re trying to create change without changing anything. And recognizing when we’re bored is the first step on that journey because this acknowledges that we’re also ready to open ourselves up to new potentials.
We don’t have to know why we’re bored, it’s enough to acknowledge that we are not happy, which is our next step. When we try to pretend we’re happy when we are really not, we are trying to convince ourselves that we are fulfilled when that is not true. So take a good look at your life and see what you aren’t happy with. Then, with that list in front of you, ask yourself what you want to change. And, get ready to break some rules that dictate how you live your life and what you are capable of, to step into high vibe, more fulfilling, joyful living, and bring in new energy to make those changes possible.
Here are five signs that you are bored with your life and it’s time to raise your vibes:
1. You dread doing certain things, or maybe everything, because it feels like it’s too much work or you know you won’t like the result.
2. What once made you happy doesn’t bring you as much joy any more, or maybe even no joy at all.
3. You have a hard time forcing yourself to do the things you feel you ‘should’ be doing, even if you keep telling yourself you should do them because they’re important.
4. You find that you are missing appointments, forgetting commitments, arriving late and wanting to leave early, or finding excuses to avoid doing things.
5. You are ready to take off and leave it all behind and even if you know you won’t do that, it’s something you think about.
Maybe you can add a few more things to your own list and that’s OK, boredom is just a sign that the energy you have been using to empower your life just isn’t working for you because you are ready for something different. So acknowledge your boredom with gratitude and set some new goals, create a new purpose for your life, dust off a few dreams, and create a new life vibe to allow the changes you need and want to happen. To get a new life you have to create a new vibe, a vibration and frequency that will support the changes you want to make. You can’t empower change with the energy you have been using to create the life you have right now and your boredom is a sign that you are ready to explore new avenues for your life path, to live on purpose, in a new purpose, and expand into new potentials and possibilities.
When I get bored I have to do something creative and I love to paint. The photo is of my bathroom, whose walls were formerly a light silvery gray color, which I have never really liked. So I painted the walls a rich, dark brown, with a dark teal accent wall, which I had thought about for several years but I thought the colors would be too dark for the small room, but it looks great. And every time I walk into the room the new color makes me smile and that raises my vibe. What can you do today to raise your vibe?
Are you ready for profound, expansive, joyful transformation? Then it’s time to raise your vibes. Join me in a new 21 Day Raise your Vibes adventure. Click here to learn more and to sign up for this program, we will start on June 24, 2014
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If you like this article and would like to work with me because you are ready for profound personal and spiritual transformation, consider a personal intuitive consultation or intuitive coaching, where we work together to examine your life path, purpose, potential, and possibilities and help you choose one that will bring you the joy, abundance, love, peace and power that you are ready for. Click here to explore the possibilities for transformation.
Copyright (c) 2014 by Jennifer Hoffman. All rights reserved. You may quote, copy, translate and link to this article, in its entirety, on free, non-donation based websites only, as long as you include the author name and a working link back to this website. All other uses are strictly prohibited.
- See more at: http://enlighteninglife.com/boredom-sign-youre-ready-new-vibe/#sthash.FyQ39NPR.dpuf
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